Funny Birth Story

            It has taken me almost a week longer than I wanted to put these words down on paper.  I wanted to revisit and share some wonderful and funny memories of my wife and the birth of our son, so here goes.

            Some of my most important, most treasured memories are of the births of my children.  It helps that my middle 2 children were uneventful pregnancies and deliveries.  It also helps that, to my perspective, there were some very funny situations during the deliveries. 

            When Sabrina went into labor with our son, James, she was in her Toyota Celica- yes than means her water broke in the car.  We will return to that later, in the mean time, we go to the hospital just as Sabrina did on that day in late July 1994.  She just drove across town to the hospital and was admitted to maternity.  This was before the days when cell phones were ubiquitous so it was a couple of hours before I made it to the hospital.  Sabrina was in her second hour of labor and everything was progressing as it should-at least we thought so, but a funny little gremlin was already in the mix.  The most important thing that takes place during labor is the opening of the cervix, which serves as a locked gate.  The cervix opens allowing the baby to be born naturally.  There are a number of things that can affect the speed and amount that the cervix opens (i.e. strength of contraction, walking, medication).  It is best when the contractions and a little walking get the cervix to fully open to the 10 centimeters generally required for natural child-birth.  Sabrina was experiencing very strong contractions and was walking up and down the hall.  Strangely, when she walked it lessened the strength of the contractions and her cervix would stop opening.  It took several hours to figure this out (you moms out there will appreciate how bad it is to unnecessarily extend labor).  We are now over 12 hours into her labor and I am getting hungry, Sabrina is sleeping (as much as she can while in labor), so I slip out to get a sandwich.  I didn’t want to miss the delivery of my son so I brought my meatball sub back to the hospital.  Imagine my surprise when Sabrina was less than pleased with my eating a meat ball sub in front of her, when she wasn’t able to eat herself. 

            At this point Sabrina has been in labor for over 24 hours and her OB was a little concerned about the rate of progress with her cervix opening.  He started her on Pitocin to “help” her cervix open faster.  He is also concerned about Sabrina being too tired to be able to assist with the delivery.  To help with that, he gives her a sedative to help her rest.  This is when the labor became its funniest.  I am sitting in a chair reading and watching Sabrina.   She is in a reclined position with her head back and facing to the left.  Every 2 minutes a contraction hits and it lasts 30 seconds.  As a contraction hits she begins to slowly move the position of her head from facing left to facing right.  This transition lasts for the duration of the contraction.  When the next contraction hits, the process is repeated in the opposite direction.  This went on for hours, back and forth, back and forth.  It was like she was watching a tennis game in slow motion.  It still makes me chuckle, my wife not so much.  (Sabrina, please don’t be too mad).  

            Happily after 34 hours our son was born.  His head did look a little like ET, but it quickly returned to a normal shape.  This is also where we return to Sabrina’s Celica.  James was born in late July.  It was the hottest time of the year in Delaware and Sabrina’s car was sitting in the parking lot with the doors and windows fully closed and the amniotic fluid soaking in the drivers seat.  At this point I went to move her car and the smell that hit me when I opened the door was as horrible as it was indescribable.  It was the last little gift from our labor gremlin.   We were able to get it clean, but up to the last day we had that car- on hot days it would smell funny.

            This is a very special and funny memory I have.  I hope it gave you a smile or chuckle.  It brightens my mood every time I think of it.